Mexi- oh no!!!

Okay, silly title.  But sitting here at a bit before midnight, unable to sleep, I needed some humor.  We went out to a Mexican restaurant for the first time in I don’t know how long today.  I love Mexican food, and have missed it a ton these past two years.  Well, I’m not missing it now!

I will admit that, having passed two years with Crohn’s and on the SCD diet, I’ve slipped a bit.  I’ve taken up the attitude that “a little won’t hurt me.”  Especially this past week, with Thanksgiving, my determination to stay strong and stay away from foods I am pretty certain are not good for me has weakened.  I guess it’s a good thing that my system is in rebellion.  Maybe it will get me back on track, like I’ve been for two years.  Fanatical almost at times with how strong I was in staying the course.  But today, it’s just showed me that this disease is still here, still lurking, and I need to be very diligent….still.

My body aches.  It almost feels like arthritis type of pain, not flu-like.  It’s in the joints of my knees and hips.  Lying down is not very comfortable, so trying to sleep wasn’t working.  This is way off from normal for me.  I don’t have aches and pains.  I have a headache….I’ve had a lot more of them since I’ve been cheating these past 3 weeks.  My stomach hurts a bit.  The gurgles have calmed down, but there is a dull ache in the lower abs.  This I have felt a few times in the past, and it is a typical sign that something is not right.  Crampy…that’s a good word.  And I don’t get cramps…….things just don’t feel right.

What did I eat?  I ate probably 1/2 a tortilla chip with about 1/2 teaspoon refried beans and salsa.  Mark had shrimp fajitas, so I thought I could have just some of the shrimp and veggie mixture…..no tortillas.  I had like 3 shrimp and 1/3 cup of the veggies.  A fork-ful of spanish rice and refried beans.  I used to love just that….with chips or tortillas.  Since I was a kid that’s what I always went towards.  That’s about it.  Of course, they cook the fajitas in their own special sauce.  That I KNOW wasn’t okay, but again, I thought it would be okay with just a small amount.  Apparently not.  That’s all I ate.  Really.  Ugh…….

Guess I’ll go take a Tylenol and try to lay down again.  I was just about asleep, and then my dog decided he needed to go outside.  Wonderful…….

At least my family room has been decorated for Christmas…..in my head.  Hopefully tomorrow I’ll have enough energy to do it for real……..

Sigh……..sometimes, I just miss being able to eat without fear.

 

 

Garlic Herb Crackers

A staple in my house is this recipe, which is for crackers made with almonds (I cannot eat any store-bought crackers).  This works great for me when I need a crunchy, salty treat.  I’ve also used these for taco night, pizza night, a quick snack with almond butter and honey, and a bunch of other things.  I love it that they are so versatile!!!  My husband also loves them, and my kids clamor for them whenever I make them.  A win-win recipe, for sure!

So last night my daughter mentioned garlic bread.  Since I cannot have your typical garlic bread, I decided to take my basic Quick Cracker recipe and modify it to see if I could get a garlicky-bread flavor.  I added some fresh parsley to it, but you could add whatever herb you want to mix the flavor up a bit.  I loved this version, though my husband likes them the normal way (he likes them simple, which just butter on top!).

Here’s the recipe:

• 1 cup almonds, ground up (it’s okay if they are not ground fine)
• 1 cup shredded cheese (cheddar is great for the basic recipe…it blends in with everything)
• 1 egg
• 2 cloves garlic, put through that little garlic tool that gets the juice out 🙂
• 1/2 cup fresh parsley, finely cut up
• 1 tsp sea salt
• fresh ground pepper

Simply add everything together and mix well.  Then lay out a sheet of parchment paper cut to the size of your rectangle cookie sheet.  Put the mixture on the paper, then put another sheet of parchment paper on top.  Take a rolling pin and roll the mixture until it is pretty thin, but even, and is about the same size as the cookie sheet.  Take the top sheet of parchment paper off, place the other one with the rolled out mixture on it onto the cookie sheet, and pop it in the oven at 350 for about 10 minutes.  Check on it at 10 minutes.  You want the edges to be turning a good brown, so bake for another 2-3 minutes until they are brown and the middle looked slightly less brown.  Be careful though as this can get overdone easily, and isn’t as tasty.  If you undercook it, the crackers simply won’t be as crunchy.

 

Happy Birthday!!!

No, it’s NOT the day I was born onto this earth!  Yesterday was the date of 2 years living with Crohn’s.  I at first wanted to title this “Happy Anniversary!” but decided on Happy Birthday instead.  Why, you might ask?  Well, a few reasons……

Even though two years ago I was given a diagnosis of a disease that would change such a fundamental part of my life- eating- this is an occasion to celebrate.  For two years I’ve relied on a strength beyond me to maintain a way of life that has changed the course of this disease.  I went against what the doctors said I needed to do in order to live with this disease.  They said steroids and immunosuppresants.  They said I would be on these powerful drugs for the rest of my life, living each day/week/month/year just hoping that a serious flare would not happen.  They said that, in the course of this disease, I would likely need more and more powerful drugs as the years went on, and would most likely end up having surgery, multiple times, to take out areas of my colon.  At 35, I was given a diagnosis of not a fatal disease that would kill me in a short amount of time, but was a slow disease that would erode my body, and my way of life.

Um….no.

What they said didn’t sit well with me.  I didn’t believe that diet played NO role in this disease.  I also believed that God was guiding me on a different path.  I also KNEW that the only way I would get through these first moments, and years, would be His strength and determination inside of me.

So, yes, I say “Happy Birthday!” to me!  I celebrate not the disease, but the LIFE that I have found in living with this disease.  I don’t believe, as a child of God, that He wants me sick, but I do believe that He will use these opportunities to teach us more about Him, and about ourselves.  As I rely more and more upon Him, even in the simple things of life such as pooping :), I find more and more how He is with me, and always has been.

Happy Birthday to me, to this disease, to this….opportunity to show people who is with me, each and every day.

 

IV #3

Well rats.  This is the third IV I’ve had since being able to get back on them.  Last year I stopped because of money, and headaches that they were giving me.  This time we bumped up the dosage just a titch, and I woke up with a headache in the middle of the night.  It’s still here.  Not as bad as what a full dose would give me, but I’m still disappointed that it’s here.  It tells me that my body is still not tolerating something in the IV’s, which stinks.  There is so much in them that my body could really use to keep everything under control, that I was hoping not to have any bad reactions.  Stink……

Ah well…the headache should be gone by tonight, if the past is any indication.  I just called the doctor to tell them about this complication, so that when I get my next IV in 3 weeks we can dial the dose back to 1/2, or just be aware and watch it.  I’ll also get my blood drawn on that day to do thyroid tests, which I’m excited about.  I want to see if these IV’s have actually calmed the little buggers down that have been attacking me these past few months….. 🙂

 

Busy eating is not good….

These past couple of days have been very, very busy.  The one thing I find most challenging in times like these in dealing with Crohn’s is what to eat when I’m on the go.  Most often I will have a granola bar and fresh fruit handy that I can grab and go.  But there are times, like this week, where there seems to be nothing I can eat.  I’m not great at pre-cooking food to take along, and pre-thinking what I will need for the coming few days.  So…..often times I just don’t eat if there is nothing safe.  Yuck….I don’t like being hungry.

I also don’t like how, since I’ve been so good for almost 2 years, it feels like it’s easier to slip and eat something I shouldn’t.  Especially when I’m really  hungry….it’s much harder to say no.  Take for instance all the kids’ Halloween candy.  It’s there…calling me.  I know I love it.  I know that it doesn’t necessarily love my gut.  I resisted, for the most part.  But even at that I’ve eaten more candy this week than in the past 2 years combined.  Thankfully it has not been very bad on my system.  That is NOT to say that, while on SCD, you can eat more candy.  I just happened to slip this week and have not had that bad of results.  I will keep telling myself though that I need to be careful.  I know that I can’t shut off my sweet tooth and cravings for baked goods very well, and know that if I give myself an inch, soon I’ll be taking the whole rope.  Then…well, life might not feel so good for a time!

Anyway….I’m taking some time to take care of me this morning.  The sink is overflowing with dishes.  The family needs clean clothes.  The house is a mess.  But…..I need some time for me.  I might make some portable foods for me to take this weekend, since the busyness continues for the next couple of days.  I think I’ve pushed my system about as far as I can push it, and need to just be a bit more aware and rein things in.  I’m not feeling any particular side-effects of the past few days.  I just know my body, and know I need to listen a bit more closely right now in order to avoid the things I don’t want to happen……