Making excuses

In another life, and another time, when I had to tell someone “No” I would feel like I had to make excuses.  I don’t know where that came from, but it’s a hard habit to break.  I guess part of me felt that I should be able to do everything and drop anything to beckon the call. Especially when it came to doing it for the church.

I just said no to something I didn’t figure I’d ever say no to.

I said no to singing.

WHAT?????

You heard me.  Me, the person who has cried for years that God would let me back into the world where he set the passions of my heart in.

But, with everything going on right now, I had to.  It would tip the plate too much for me to say yes.  Though everything in my body wanted to say yes, and I desperately searched for a way to say yes…..I had to say no.

It was the right decision, yet, I found myself wanting to make excuses.  I wanted to say all that’s on my plate and to explain why I can’t add one more thing.  I heard the phrases in my head, “But, it’s for God.  Can’t you just trust him to provide for you?  Why can’t you drop everything for HIM?  You must not be a very good Christian.”

Uh huh……

I think those impressions were given to me once upon a time, in a different life.

But I’m a new creation now.  And I’m in a new family.  I trust their heart’s, and their motivations.

No is an okay word.

We are all mothers, fathers, workers, and children of God.

Just because I said no once, does not mean that it will always be a no.

I walk each and every day trusting God.  My only hope is in Him.

Just because I said no does not mean that the door is closed.

HE knows whats going on.  And HE will use me, when the time is right.

 

Grrrrr…….

I’m trying to figure out what I ate this time.  I’VE BEEN GOOD!!!!  Really, I’ve had nothing recently that should be causing me distress.  Everything has been food that I should be able to eat.  Yet, I’ve had a dull ache in the right side for the past few days, there’s been a bit more urgency to go, and this morning my stomach feels tight and full even though I haven’t eaten a whole lot.  Ugh!!!  Sometimes this disease is really annoying…….

The ONLY thing that is different is that I roasted a turkey on Sunday and have eaten that the past few days.  Yes, a turkey.  It is in the same family as chicken, and I eat a whole lot of chicken with NO problems.  It didn’t look like it had anything added to it (I checked the label, but maybe I missed something?).  It looked like a plain ol’ turkey.  But…I can’t really think of anything else in the past couple of days that I’ve eaten.  Why on earth would my body be rejecting A STINKIN’ TURKEY?????

I’m not really frustrated, even though my writing might imply that.  I’ve learned to live with the uncertainty of this disease, and that fact that I can do everything right, and still have problems crop up.  The dull ache has been here for more than just 3 days, so I don’t think that was caused by the turkey.  The poor bird might not be to blame at all…… 🙂

Good thing I made my Chicken Soup last week!  I have 7 quarts of it ready to go in the freezer, so I guess I’ll be eating more of that for the next few days to see if things calm down.

 

Brain, brain, go away….

What does my brain look like as I’m lying in bed and can’t sleep?  Well, here are some snapshots:

“My feet are hot.”

“Did Pugsly go outside before bed?”

“May 13th…it’s coming…..”

“Did you tell everyone you were expecting?”

“Shoot!  May 14th is coming and I still have a ton to do!!!”

“Gone, gone, gone, gone, gone, gone, gone, gone.”

“Oh where, is my hairbrush?”

“That book is really good.”

“I need to send in that ticket tomorrow.”

“Printer ink.”

“Ugh, my house is a mess!”

“I don’t really like bubble gum.”

“Gotta get chicken feed tomorrow.”

“Man, I must sleep SOON!”

“He’s snoring again…..”

And on, and on it goes.  If you’ve seen the movie UP, it’s like an endless cycle of “SQUIRREL!!!”  There are times where I just can’t shut my brain off, and it endlessly moves from one topic to another for a couple of hours.  I’ve trained myself how to shut my brain down….I know the techniques, so it’s not often that this happens.  But when it does, there simply is nothing I can do to shut it off so I might as well get up.  Maybe it’s running full-speed ahead right now because I have so much going on.  I’m thinking that if I take some time right now to get my week, with ALL it’s details, laid out then my brain might have a chance at rest.  I don’t usually stretch myself this thin, but things just added up.  I’ll get through the next 3 weeks, of that I’m sure.  I just hope I don’t need a straight-jacket when it’s all said and done!!!  🙂

 

Just…..believe

Where has He brought you out of?  What did it look like?  Have you forgotten?

Why should you praise him?  Why should you give the glory to Him?

What has He given to you?  What has he yet to give to you?

God’s not done with any of us yet.  Our life is a journey.  Yes, often it is a struggle.  Sometimes, the struggle doesn’t seem like it’s worth it.

But we need to keep pressing on.

Why?

Because, again, God is not done with us yet.  He has a plan.  He has a plan for you.

That’s why He brought you out of the grave.

That’s why you are alive today.

That’s why he has blessed you with what you have.

That’s why he gave his Son to die on the cross.

Because He has a plan.

He has a plan for each of us.

Don’t let Jesus’ death be in vain.

Believe in what He died for.

He died for you.

He died so you can be saved, and so you can share that light and life with others.

Believe in yourself and the life He has given you.

Don’t let a moment go by without remembering this.

Look for the God-moments, and live into the life that He has given to you.

 

Strawberry Scones

Did you know that Almond Flour is extremely easy to bake with?  Though it doesn’t “poof up” like white-flour bread products, it still has a great taste and is amazingly good for you!  Most almond flour recipes I’ve encountered have a few basic ingredients:  Almond Flour, sea salt, baking soda, and eggs.  Out of these ingredients I can make just about anything.  If you add honey, it makes a sweet treat.  Grapeseed oil can add a level of moistness that I haven’t seen in a long time.  And any sort of spices, fruits, and even chocolate can be added to change it up a bit.  Almond flour is low-carb, high in protein, and rich in vitamins, minerals, and good fats.  In short, it is a great alternative to processed, white-flour products!  Almond flour can be expensive though, so I have to be careful not to overdo it.  Honeyville is a great place to buy almond flour online.  If you bake with it a lot, buying the 25 pound box is a great deal.  Simply separate it out into gallon-freezer bags when it comes, stick the extras in the freezer, and you have months of almond flour on hand for those sweet treats you are craving for!

So today I wanted to make scones.  I couldn’t add the chocolate like the recipe calls for, so instead I decided to chop up some fresh strawberries and fold them in.  I made a half-batch…just enough treats for me for a few days.  I’d take a picture, but to do that I would have to stop eating them long enough to get one!  🙂

Here’s what I did:

1 1/4 cups almond flour

1/4 teaspoon sea salt

1/4 teaspoon baking soda

1/8 cup honey

1/6 cup of grapeseed oil

1 egg

1 cup chopped fresh strawberries

Add the dry ingredients together.  Then add the wet ingredients, including the egg, and whisk well.  Add the wet ingredients to the dry, and mix will.  Fold in the strawberries.  Drop by 1/4 cup spoonfuls on a cookie sheet lined with parchment paper.  Bake in the oven at 350 for about 15 minutes, or until the tops just start to get a good brown.

That’s it!  Bake these treats, and enjoy them with your coffee or tea in the morning.

I am.  🙂

 

Rough night

I wrote this post in my half-awake state last night, but couldn’t get out of bed to get the words out.  I needed to sleep, but couldn’t.  My brain woke me up freaked out about the fact that in under a month we lose our house, unless something can be done.  Kept thinking, “I don’t want to lose my house!  I don’t want to lose my house!” and playing the scenario of what that would like look.  Finally, I had to put my brain straight, which let me get back to sleep:  Remember that HE will take care of us.  HE will provide for all our needs.  HE knows what’s going to happen.  HE has it all figured out.

He will not abandon us.

It will all be okay, regardless of what it looks like, because my life is in HIS hands.

 

No

In our society it seems that the word “No” has a bad connotation.  Maybe it’s because we equate it with how we parent our kids and our dogs.  We throw the word around whenever they do something we don’t like, or ask for something we don’t want them to have.  It can be a challenge to be a “Yes” parent, because the “No” is so much easier to say.

I’m teaching something different to my kids.  It still means the same thing when I’m parenting.  I still use it when they ask for something I don’t want them to have or do.  But right now Laura and I are in the process of seeking donations for a Silent Auction.  I could get all twisted up whenever I walk into a new business asking for these donations and worried that they’ll tell me no.  But, I’m teaching Laura that the word “No” is okay.  Here’s where I’m coming from on this:

If our hope is in these people, and if we have our heart set in what THEY can do, their No might crush us.  It might make us depressed that we didn’t get a donation.  We could start to spiral thinking that we are not getting what we need from these people in order to go on our trip.

But if our hope is in what GOD provides for us, a No from someone is simply that.  It’s a NO from a person, but it’s not a NO from our God.  The human being the No came from cannot dictate our lives.  Their words cannot control us if we don’t let them.  Their No is simply……a word.

Before we go out looking for donations, Laura and I pray.  Our prayer is always that God’s will be done, that his grace will shine down on us, and that HE will provide all that we need.

Armed with this knowledge, we know that if a business says No, it does not mean that God has said No.  We know that he will take care of us.  We know that he loves us and wishes to shower us with his blessings.  He knows our needs, and will be faithful to provide.

Why should we be scared of this word?  Why should it govern how some of us interact with people, and what we share or ask for?

In His word it says “Ask and it will be given to you.  Seek and you will find.”

If we never ask, if we never seek…….what will we get?

Don’t be afraid of No.  I’m trying to be more a mom of “Yes” than a mom of “No.”  And if I know anything about our God, it’s that He is a God of “Yes.”  His yes is one of love for his children, and his desire to shower us with his protection, his grace, and his provision for our lives.

And if he does say No?  You can bet that there is a pretty good reason behind it!

 

Where am I?

Oh, I’m still here, believe me!  After fighting that bug, a spring break trip to Idaho, cleaning out Grandpa’s barn, and a last-minute garage sale, I am in fact still here.  Sometimes I might want to be in a sunny location taking a nap where I can hear the waves gently crashing, but alas, here I am!

Things continue to move on.  Teaching is still what I’m doing, though it’s not where my passion is.  I’m thinking I need to devote some serious prayer to God that he would release me from this.  It’s good money, but I don’t want to be a substitute for the rest of my life.  It’s easy for me to do, but it’s just not where my heart is.

Financially….things keep plugging along.  We are trying to save our house from Foreclosure, which looms over us in the next couple of weeks.  We have a plan, and feel confident in where God is leading us.  That’s all I can say for now, but I know I’ll write more later.

It does weigh on me at times.  Overall, I’ve kept a pretty level head, and not allowed the “impending doom” get to me.  🙂  I’m one that puts my hope in the Lord, and not our own paths or plans.  I guess I just don’t allow my heart and mind to dwell on what’s happening.  I think it will just serve to drag me down if I do, so I just take each day as it comes, and find the joy and the blessings that are there.  Keep praying for me, and my family, that we will remain strong in Him……